Saturday, August 21, 2010

.......and my heart breaks.

I have felt extra contemplative these last few days and have just felt utterly broken by the events and heartbreaking stories I have heard this last week.....

Today, I was on the way to the soup kitchen as usual when I saw a murdered man lying on the side of the road surrounded by a cop car and bystanders.....and I wonder....who was this young man? Did he know Jesus? Did he know today would be his last day? My heart breaks for his family.

 The unspeakable stories I have heard this week haunt me and for just a moment I feel hopeless. A baby sold in the slums, the horrible things that missionaries have done, split families, lack of family peace. Youth going through so much, youth straying from the church,.....all things that interrupt my life for a moment and make me hurt for the pain they feel.

 I hate these interruptions of my happy- go- lucky personality. Why is there so much injustice? Why do some people have to go through so much.....while others live such a blessed life..... But......through all these heart wrenching things.....God speaks to me.

 I see hope in the children's faces at the Soup kitchen. They smile and carry on playing as if nothing horrible is going on in the world. I see their innocence even as they grow up in some of the worst environments. I hear the passion that God gives some youth to follow him, lives truly reborn. I love hearing the stories of recovery and how God works through even the worst circumstances. I love how all of this drives me to pray that much more.

 My God hurts for all the people involved here. My God weeps for the injustice in the world. He longs for all to come to him and give their pain to him. My God desires to heal. My God is so powerful that he can bring good from disaster and can restore hope those who have no hope at all. Who will bring this hope? Who comforts the broken who do not know God? I can't imagine how much more painful life would be if I didn't have God to be here with me. I cannot change all these circumstances and I am no savior but the hope of Christ keeps me going. The smiles on those kids faces....keeps me going. The dedication and love I see in other people keeps me going. There is always hope.